Jesus Henry Christ (2012)

Unfairly bashed by critics as self-consciously quirky and "hipster," "Jesus Henry Christ" is a entertainingly quirky little film, featuring highly intelligent characters who must find their own way towards being happy.

Henry James Herman (Jason Spevack) is an enigma, a brilliant youngster raised by his single mother Patricia (Toni Collette.) Henry has a keenly incisive mind and a photographic memory, but there is one thing he doesn't know... who his dad, an anonymous sperm donor, is.

Enter dweeby professor Slavkin O'Hara (Michael Sheen), whose latest mistake is putting his 12-year-old daughter Audrey (Samantha Weinstein)'s face on his new book, Made Gay or Born That Way? Audrey, as it turns out, is gay, but she's not ready to be outed just yet, and Slavkin's bug-up provokes the merciless taunts of her peers.

Monday Wrap Up: Game of Thrones, Hotel Rwanda, This Film Is Not Yet Rated

This Week: Easter is upon us, and my little one -- Trisha -- has been busy praying to the Easter bunny. Yes, you read that right. This child has a creative understanding of theology. She is skeptical of the notion that the son of God rose from the dead, but she seems to put complete faith in her prayers to the Easter bunny. :-) Go figure.

I haven't been reading, watching, or blogging as much as I'd like. Happily, my co-blogger has been picking up the slack, writing plenty of film reviews.

Spring break will soon be over and I'll be teaching and volunteering at Trisha's school, along with carrying out my calling in life which, as we all know, is to chauffeur my kids around all over Central/Western Virginia. I really wasted my time paying off all those student loans for graduate school. Once I had my ovaries and my driver's license, I was fully prepared for my life's purpose. :-P

Spring soccer also started this week, so I'll be held hostage to the soccer mom gig until June. :-) Plus I have a few other projects in the works. So my presence on the interwebs may be smaller for a while.

Wishing For: A long, temperate spring before the heat of summer sets in.

Poltergeist (1982)

When it comes right down to it, "Poltergeist" is pure silliness, starring adult protagonists who soon prove themselves to be TOO STUPID TO LIVE. The problem is not merely that is "out-dated," although it is. "Psycho" was outdated, but it had a good story and a good villain.

   I'm not impressed with "Poltergeist"'s story at all, and the villains (the ghosts haunting the house and ultimately, Satan) are only interesting if you make them interesting. I've never seen evil seem so lame.

   Suburban mom Diane Freeling (JoBeth Williams) -- peppy, smiley and complete with 80's hair -- does not seem the least bit alarmed when furniture starts moving by itself and her daughter Carol Anne (Heather O'Rourke, whose life tragically ended not too long after the movie was made) begins conversing with  spirits through the television.

Gypsy (1993)

The first part of this film, led by a manic Bette Midler, plays like "Toddlers & Tiaras" for the Great Depression era. Mama Rose (Midler) spends so much time immersing her daughters in showbiz and sick infantilism, insisting on making them wear little girl's clothes well into puberty, that she forgets what is best for her girls altogether.

   Though not as dark a musical as Tim Burton's "Sweeney Todd" or Lars Von Trier's "Dancer in the Dark," "Gypsy" emanates a diseased kind of wistfulness, marked by broken dreams and shattered egos. Meanwhile Bette Midler plays Mama Rose as if it was her last performance on earth, but backed up by the stagy sets and old-timey attitude, her performance is actually a strength, not a deterrent.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)

Okay, confession time- this is my first "Planet of the Apes" movie. I have never seen the Charlton Heston original. Hell, I haven't even seen the crappily reviewed Tim Burton film with Helena Bonham Carter and Mark Wahlberg.

But I have to say, despite my lack of experience with the "Apes" franchise, this one grabbed my attention right away. This is up there with Neill Blomkamp's "District 9" as science fiction at its most emotionally charged, tinged with social commentary.

This is a star-studded cast -- James Franco, John Lithgow, Tom Felton of the "Harry Potter" films -- and yet the film belongs to the apes. These CGI wonders are incredibly realistic, and through the magic of modern technology, given the facial expressions of actors.

Tucker and Dale vs. Evil (2010)

"Tucker and Dale vs. Evil" is a willfully ridiculous, ridiculously bloody, balls-out and slightly touching film that allows the hillbillies to be the heroes for a change.

Tucker and Dale, far from the chainsaw-wielding, pig-raping rednecks we have come to expect from horror movies and West Virginia jokes, are just trying to have a nice time at their vacation home when out of the blue come a group of college kids who also want to have a nice time... but quickly become an incompetent lynch-mob over a series of misunderstandings.

The progression of the plot is super simple -- somehow, under various circumstances, these doltheads keep killing themselves all around Tucker and Dale's vacation home. Meanwhile, lovelorn Dale (Tyler Labine) harbors a crush on one of the college girls (Katrina Bowden,) while Dale (Firefly's Alan Tudyk) encourages him to believe in himself.

Monday Wrap-Up, Lammy Awards, Bloggiesta

I'm experimenting with a new format for my Monday wrap-ups. I'll give it a go and see how I like it. :-)

This Week: I believe there is a Hebrew proverb that says, "If you want to make G-d laugh, tell Him your plans." This week is Spring Break at Trisha's school and the beginning of spring soccer season for Trisha and James. So we got hit with a few inches of snow.

On the up side, this gives me another week to work out how to get two kids to different Monday soccer practices, in different locations, at roughly the same time.

Open Range (2003)

When my dad tried to get me to watch this movie, my response was "A western? I hate westerns! Blech-arg!" But considering the psychological mind-fuck films he had watched at my request, I figured I owed him recommendation-wise. So begrudgingly, I watched "Open Range" with him.

I didn't expect to like it. Heck, maybe I didn't WANT to like it, just so I could look at him all squinty-eyed, sigh and say "See? Westerns suck. Now I don't have to watch one ever again!"

But, to my surpise, I found myself engrossed in the plot and the characters, not to mention the unconventional casting choices (Annette Bening playing a character who ISN'T a stuck-up bitch? Michael Gambon playing a stone-cold killer?) If you, like me, claim to hate westerns, "Open Range" might be a good place to start.

Oz the Great & Powerful and Blogger Links to Share

I'm older than most of the bloggers I follow. Hell, I seem to be older than most people these days. ;-) I grew up in an era when VCRs were not yet a twinkle in anyone's eye. We had network T.V, which meant we got three channels -- y'know, if we jiggled the rabbit ears just right. And springing for a movie theater ticket -- a whopping $3 -- was a luxury. So we kids lived for those revered television specials. Of which the best of the best was, of course, The Wizard of Oz.

Julien Donkey-Boy (1999)

"Julien Donkey-Boy" is an occasionally emotional, mainly tedious foray into the art of Dogme 95, laden with grainy visuals and non-existent plotting. It recalls the much better film "Buddy Boy," which came out the same year. "Buddy Boy" director Mark Hanlon knew how to engage your interest and make you care about his main character, despite his shortcomings.

Julien is a 20-something paranoid schizophrenic played by Ewen Bremner, one of the most underutilized character actors of today. Julien lives with his equally disturbed father, younger brother, and sister, who he has impregnated before the film's beginning.

Uncomfortable yet? The whole movie works to make the viewer feel discomfort while also invoking sadness and emotion. At this it is only moderately successful. The dialogue is often random and directionless. The experience of the film is akin to having hundreds of puzzle pieces of differing shapes and sizes, none of them fitting together in the least.

12 Movie Lives we Don't Envy

Sometimes I think the majority of Hollywood is about letting its viewers live in a fantasy world where nerds can score, life can be wrapped up in a nice little package, and the women have bigger boobs and smaller waists. Here are some movies that offer grim, even terrifying glimpses into the lives of the less fortunate. Take a look ...

P.S. If this post is well received, I might consider writing a sequel.

Top 10 Movie Scenes I've Been Trying to Scrub From My Brain

You know how something you've seen can be nasty, disturbing, whacked out, or just plain icky that it's inexorably burned into your brain? And you think, "Oh well, give it some time and the memory will fade." But of course, it doesn't.

On any given day, I can't remember where I left my car keys or who I promised to call. But these images are still unshakably lodged in my cranium. Hell, I'll probably forget the names of my children before some of these movie scenes slip from my mind. ;-)

Anyhoo ... I haven't actually written any reviews lately (happily, my co-blogger, Sarah, has been picking up the slack), and I thought this would be a fun post. The idea popped into my head while visiting one of my favorite bloggers and was partially inspired by Nikki's "Most Disturbing Films." 

 
10. The Opening Masturbation Scene (Buddy Boy)